Transbians vs Lesbians!

Polarized views on this topic create regular flare ups between the trans community and their allies in the #LWiththeT part of the lesbian community and those lesbians, who feel it is an appropriation of their sexuality and same sex community. Many who identify with the concerns and sentiments conveyed in the #GettheLOut and #cottonceiling hashtag threads and articles and protests.

The idea of pre-op or non-op trans women having sexual/romantic attraction to women/females was not long ago referred to tongue in cheek as "Transbians".

Now that the mantra "Trans women are women" has become a de facto biological/physiological statement in the minds of many in the trans community the redefining of sexual orientation through the lens of "gender identity" is now well under way!

"Lesbians are sexually/romantically attracted to women, trans women are women therefore can be lesbians and women sexually/romantically attracted to trans women are still lesbians!"

The problem with these statements is that you cannot separate physiology and genitalia from sexuality & sexual orientation. At least not for the 99% of the population, who are not transgender. Yes lesbians are attracted to women with the 99% certainty that women have vaginas and share the common experiences of being females. Lesbians not only are having their sexuality obscured but also their spaces and gatherings intruded upon by these lesbian identifying trans women with the false assumption that lesbians should be interested in them because "trans women are women"! They then have to navigate around that minefield of "If I say no am I going to be called a bigot, transphobe, terf, genital obsessed fetishist??!!"

Some of these may be alarmist but demonstrates what lesbians are experiencing.

Trans women bloggers & tweeters will object that "No one is forcing any lesbian to have sex with them! We wouldn't want to have sex with such bigoted, transphobic, terfy, genital obsessed fetishists anyways!" "Oops did I say that out loud?"

Regardless of how the denials are worded its clear from the many threads and blog posts that this is EXACTLY what they think of those lesbians, who dare to exclude trans women from their dating pool!

Most of the women in relationships with trans women gladly indulge this seemingly harmless request to use "gender affirming" language for validation. Many having made the switch from a heterosexual couple to "always lesbians" once transition has begun! For myself couples can identify however they like up until there is a detachment from physiological reality and this trans roleplaying is foisted onto the lesbian and LGBT community as a whole, with demands for everyone to comply with this "inclusive" and "gender affirming" language or be labeled a bigot, transphobe, etc.

The James Charles "transphobic" faux pas was a clear illustration of how this redefining of sexuality and sexual identity through the lens of gender identity is creating backlash for gay men also, who dare to say they don't include trans men in their dating pool or would not consider it as being homosexual, if they did have sex with someone with a vagina!

Buckle your seat belts as this is going to continue if not put in check by the LGBT community as a whole.

One of many reaction videos to James Charles comments on HIS sexuality.

For myself as a trans woman I don't think that everyone else in the LGBT community needs to accommodate or validate my gender identity, when it comes to something as personal as their sexuality, sexual orientation and sexual identity, that they have fought long and hard for their gay and lesbian rights to exclude members & genitalia of the opposite sex!

It's not a matter of "Well you are not recognizing us a REAL women or REAL men then?!"

We are real trans women and real trans men and whatever our current genitalia is does come into play (pardon the pun) when talking about sex, sexuality and sexual orientation. And effects the interest or lack of interest by others based on THEIR SEXUAL ORIENTATION!

Everyone in the LGBTQIAAP2S+++ community is important. Each celebrates their own sexuality & gender identities. And like any community mutual respect is the only way to maintain unity and cohesion in the face of anti-LGBT bias & bigotry. Concerns from within the community cannot be brushed aside or worse ostracizing part of our community.

Compromises need to be made and some language, which is blatantly lesbophobic and homophobic needs to be dropped by the trans community. Some blatant transphobic misgendering and disrespectful language needs to be dropped by lesbians raising the #cottonceiling alarm!